Saturday, January 28, 2012

You, Me & Words.


I'd known her forever. I used to loved our never ending conversations. Mostly she used to take the lead, and I used to be a mere follower. Well, I liked it that way. Those string of never ending words falling off your delicate lips. Those eyes, whose colour changed with every word she spoke. Those weren't just words to me, each word you spoke was a story to my senses. With every word you spoke to me, I fell a little more. It was magic. Those conversations seemed the world to me. I thought I knew her. I thought I knew myself too. I silently felt proud about how I felt, thinking can conversations be better? So full of words, that if there were no boundations, we'd never stop talking. 
Until that day, when she came and sat across the table with me. She seemed to be a bit upset, I was a bit off the hook too. Both of our minds were full of so many thoughts, but for some strange reason they couldn't suffice into words. On a usual day, we'd be half done telling each other about our days schedule by now. But today, somehow it just didn't seem to happen. After moments of silence, a tear fell off her eyes. I could feel the world crashing around me. I still couldn't speak a word. I just didn't know what to say. I gathered all the courage I had, and looked straight into her eyes. As soon as her eyes met mine, within seconds, she burst out. It was an endless stream of tears. I kept looking into those teary eyes. After seemingly never ending sadness, she calmed down. I looked backed at her, and smiled a little. I don't know why I did that. She looked at me for a second, eventually bursting into a laugh. She got up and hugged me as never before. We were exported to some other world. It all just seemed to come together in that moment. I felt I'd never known her before this moment. Those walls between us, just broke apart. Time just stood still. We'd never felt more complete. It all seemed to have a purpose.
And it struck me, during all our conversations about love, life, people, ideas, thoughts, I thought I'd never felt her essence. I had never met the real her before today. I felt, how futile words are. Real conversations don't even need them. How misleading, confusing and unfulfilling words are. Best things in life can't be spoken out and explained, they can just be felt and conveyed through silence.